Fail, fail, fail, maybe...? tank...

OK ok sorry im a little late on my once a week blog but, i started school so monday and tuesday I was busy damnit...

Alright where are we? So Jonas says this blog is no longer about my internet dating just my dating life in general... Summary: THERE IS NONE!! HA!But there's always stories! So lets recap shall we? I got three stories: Girl #2, a.k.a. the carrot on a string, internet you still suck, and haunted past.This will be an anger post by the way, so im sure ill offend just about every woman not related too me, and most that are...

Oh yes girl#2 has struck again... She's like s mini nightmare(cause she's short, get it)!!! Ladies ladies, not only are you CRAZY but you are flakey!!! good hell. months of chasing and falling flat on my face only to stand back up chase again and then get kicked in the nuts... i've perminently removed the sign from my back and put it on my nuts its that bad. Anyways rambling. Ladies, if its your idea you better do everything humanly possible to make sure you show up! if not i want proof your leg is actually missing from the car accident. We were supposed to go fishing i spent saturday getting ready for it and new license, tackle, blah blah blah and sunday morning she drank too much the night before didnt wake up on time, and im pissed! Done done done! Girls, guys may be assholes but your not helping!!

And the internet dating isn't exactly poppin off either! I should be somewhere around 50 "matches" right now and I think I've really only contacted maybe six.. Alot of sent emails, I really am gonna believe from that previous girls silence that I look like a serial killer.. Which coincidently I just went from hopeless romantic to serial killer as of today.. Tousche! I did ask a girl to get coffee sometime but she didn't write me back for 5 days, but she said she had a death in the family, likely excuse.. I'm sure I'm goin to he'll for mocking that, but that's no shocker.. But she didn't say she wanted to get coffee yet either. Fail.

Alright haunted past your turn.... This ones my favorite yet. And this one is totally not anger towards her I'm just gonna go with horrible timing! Beautiful girl!! Wow!! Just need to point that out, and out of my league but I shoot for the stars dammit. Anyways Friday night was bar night, the boys are goin plus a wife and her friend... The bar ends up being awesome! I met one girl with a woody woodpecker tattoo on her arm.. Were talkin high quality, but she was cute! She stuck around for a bit but some how this gorgeous blonde calls me out that she knows me.... Woody girl goes m.I.a. Basically my focus changed... Now I don't forget a blonde.. Ask anyone that remotely knows me.. So who is this girl!? Well I went to high school with her! She remembers me from that far back, I make good impressions ;)....anyways one thing leads to another, buying her drinks, carrying her shoe around(?), talkin all night. Yes I got her number.. Weve been flirty Ever since! Forward to today... I talk her into dinner tonight she seems stoked, I'm definitely stoked! Not two hours later.... I get the text. I CAN'T WIN!! This is the store of my life. Referencing the fishing story I can hook women left and right but I ain't netting shit! She's got a legite excuse, but like I said the kick me sign is on my nuts.

I'm done trying... But like my sister said"til next weekend".

Few good quotes from the week from me and my friends.

Dan, " you see some hot chick with some goofy looking guy and think he's either rich or one hell of a salesman."
Me, " ya it's called his penis is bigger then mine".

Me, "I'm a shallow bastard with high expectations! I'm never getting laid..."
BJ, "keep your standards, lower your expectations."
Me, "I'm gonn need a hot drunk slut..."

Dan, "women become crazy, And guys become assholes.. It's a vicious cycle. We need to find the point that women become crazy!"
Me, " I blame the asshole that took her virgnity."
Dan,"touché"